Another busy semester

Practicum has begun again and it gets harder and harder to wake up with every day. I'm thinking about too many things and I'm not prioritizing properly. It'll work out, but I guess I'm just tired. I would like to have a break or two!

Ahh. I went to Utah Fashion Week today. It was actually pretty interesting! I'm glad I went! 

Practicum is starting

I know I haven't been posting videos and I apologize, but life is really too busy right now, and probably will be for the next month. My second semester of practicum is starting and I'll be in a 3rd grade classroom. Don't get me wrong, I'm extremely excited to be in a classroom with students, but I am not excited about the workload with my work schedule on top of it. It basically just means that I will probably be running on very very little sleep everyday and very very busy lesson planning and making sure I have all the things I need for post-practicum.

Wish me luck!

Friendship moments

First of all, my apologies for not posting a video for yesterday. I did take a pretty funny one of my sister at the grocery store, but I don't have her permission to post it yet. Haha Also, last night ended up being much less wild than I thought it would be. I realize that I really do seem to get some form of anxiety at crowded places. I just get really uncomfortable really fast. 

Anyways, my post for today is going to be about one of my best friends, Hunter, because he came to visit me just now. Hunter and I have known each other for about... 3-4 years now? Since both or freshman semesters in college, and we've been best friends ever since. Although it doesn't seem like a long time, we've been friends with each other through all kinds of growing up we've had to do. We're totally different people from when we first met, but we're probably even closer friends than we were before. He went and served a mission for two years, and the only way I could communicate with him was through emails once a week and the occasional photos. Ever since he came back to school, we haven't been able to spend as much time together. He had his stuff going on, and I had mine. We're busy busy people (him in social ways, me in school ways). But every now and then, we'll hang out and catch up. Recently, it feels like it's been particularly difficult to hang out. We went from seeing each other at least every other week to every other month.

The last time we saw each other before today was probably at the beginning of January. As some of you know, a lot can happen in a month! In January, and through our random times of texting, I had been starting to feel like there was something wrong with Hunter. Our friendship didn't really seem to be the same? So today was good. I got some worries cleared up and I realized that he's been going through quite a bit.

He shared a "friendship moment" with me. Through various thoughts and decisions he has had, he decided that he needed to keep me as a friend, for sure. And I'm glad he did! Currently, in the place that I am at, I don't think I have a friendship like the one I have with him with anyone else. While our opinions, lifestyles, and priorities can be pretty different, there's this balance where we are on the same page still. 

So I'm just going to take the space on this post to personally thank him for always being the friend that I need. And I thank him for needing me too! Our lives may fall in different places, but I sure hope we'll always be friends!

In class and on task

I totally forgot that I took a video yesterday! That's what happens when I miss too many days in a row, I guess... Anyways, I was in my Tech class and we were told to check out the tools on the google image search engine. So of course, I had to look up puppies. Have you heard of a Shar Pei puppy? Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my dog, but these wrinkly puppies are also just too cute!

Anyways, I'll hopefully remember to take a video of my evening later today and will post it later!

Sleeping off the sickness

I got sick over the weekend. So I slept for 11 hours these past two nights. Sorry I have no videos. Motivation is definitely lacking when I'm sick.

Valentine's Day

I posted this on my status today, and I stand by it...

I think we should all be a little bit in love with ourselves...

Said yours truly.

So love all of your lovely selves this Valentine's Day! smile emoticon

*Inspired by Beth Chestnut's status.

To live.

I've noticed through social media that there have been quite a few announcements of death. These are people that I may not have been particularly close with, but knew. I feel like, although I'm not really afraid of the idea of death because of my religious beliefs, it doesn't change the feelings of sadness that I have within me. I feel like death from age is probably the only time where I think, "They lived such a fulfilling life." But when people's lives are cut short, I just feel sad. I feel like they still had more to live for.

There have been multiple times where I have experienced near-death. Every time, I realize that I might be just a little bit afraid to die. Not because I fear what will happen next, but because I feel like I'd have regrets. Regrets of having not been able to do various things. "Dang. I never got to be a wife or a mom to anyone. I wasn't able to have a classroom of my own to teach in, with my own students. I wasn't able to travel and experience other cultures. I wasn't able to sing on a stage again. etc."

Yes, I do have plans for all of these things. I plan to fulfill these desires. I feel like these goals that I have set for myself have given me my own reason to live. I'm living for myself. But if I get a terminal illness, or into an accident, I'd have regrets. I'd want to live to fulfill these goals. I may not have known these people - they may have felt that they've accomplished all that they needed to - but for me personally... I have things to do that I'm working towards. I don't want to die. Not yet.

*I did take a video for the day, but I want to post something that fit the mood of the post, I guess?

A roommate

My roommate, Melissa, is seriously... So great. She is an awesome human being and has helped me with so much. I just wanted to put out there how grateful I am to have gotten to know her. :)

Chatting with Ricks.

I know... I've mossed the past couple of days. My stress levels have been increasing recently so I havent been prioritizing my videos very much - especially if they're just going to be the same ol' videos.

Today, I visited with one of my professors from last semester. He was my professor for Children's Literature which was a great class, and he is a great teacher! We got to talk about a lot of stuff, and about life. He also really got my pumped for the future ahead of me! We talked about taking away the misconception that we are limited, or restricted.

He also recommended a book to me:
"When You Reach Me" by Rebecca Stead.
I took the book right then and finished it like, half an hour ago. Seriously, such a great read! I don't even know how to explain the story well with out giving something away. It was a little slow at first, I thought. I just kept reading though (and the chapters are so short). In the end.... Wow. Everything ended up being so important.

Not as happy as this blog should be

I think I'm getting sick from sleep deprivation and unhealthy eating habits. I cant wait for spring where I'll be exercising a lot more. Winters can be so dang gloomy.

The self.

Hmmmm.

Beyond two souls

My sister and I just watched the gameplay/walkthrough/cutscenes for the video game, Beyond Two Souls, all day today. Sorrym for the lazy posts recently. I'll try to be more detailed soon!

Late night? Morning?

Good morning. I have not slept yet. So I will be sleeping now.

Day by day

Everyday I think... "Just gotta make it through the day." When I feel like it's been too many days, I think... "Just gotta make it through the week." When I feel like it's been too many weeks, I think, "The month is almost over, just gotta make it through the month." Before I know it, time has passed.

Slowly stressed

I can feel myself getting stressed out. My schedule is seriously the worst right now and I just feel like... I want to cry. The more sleep-deprived I get, the more cranky and emotional I get. And I can feel it hitting me. I really think I might just need to get through the rest of this week, but I also get this feeling like - this month and next month are going to be insane. Mountain Dew will probably have to be my best friend, or else I have no idea how I'm going to make it through while still keeping my job.

Realizing the important things

Recently, I've been thinkingof about a lit of stuff. I think I've kinda said something like this before too. But today, I got to chat with one of my very good friends and we got to talk a lot about the things I've been co cerned about. She helped me break down many of the assumptions I had and really unintentionally helped give me peace of mind. My thoughts are still a little bit incomplete, so I'm not ready to post about it quite yet, but one of the things that my friend encouraged me to do was to start writing about things that are important to me - things that I feel passionate and/or thoughtful about, that has an impact on me and/or my life. SO, I've started a list. I kind of love lists. Haha. Ideally, over time throughout the year, I will work my way to writing about each of the things that are important to me. I do worry about professionalism, as I will be starting an actual career fairly soon, but I will do my best to continue being honest in my publicized thoughts.

Snowy

Its been snowing. And snowing. And snowing some more. I want to stay home all day everyday.

A day late

Sundays are always so busy... Then I also had to sign up for spring classes. Good thing I took my video in the beginning of the day.