Summer Reflection

Seriously, after I heard this song, it instantly reminded me of my summer adventures with the greatest group of people I could ever have the pleasure of knowing. Of course, there are so many other people who I've had the opportunity to spend time with over this past summer, but this song reminds me of the time I spent with my roommates and neighbors, specifically.

Thanks for all the fun times and memories! I may have moved, but I'll see ya around! :) I look forward to the future adventures we'll share!

 

Love you! <3

New Place

I moved! This is now my room.

I left everything that I loved about my previous home (roommates, neighbors, church, etc.). And the only thing I didn't love (dishes). Now I am to find new things to love. (Although they will most likely also be roommates, neighbors, church, etc... just different.)

Change is hard. I'm not sure if I've mentioned it before already, but I don't deal with change very well, at all.

However, ever since I came to the decision to not serve a mission, I felt very strongly about moving.
Especially to this particular house.

My dear friend, Charlotte, came to visit me in my new abode and shared with me something that Pres. Uchtdorf said:

Endings are not our destiny... there are no true endings, only everlasting beginnings.

I pondered this and started thinking that I probably don't like change because I feel like something is ending. Whether it is the possibility of a friendship ending, or a lifestyle.

This kind of understanding made me realize what has been helping me transition more smoothly than usual.

All the memories, relationships, and lessons I experienced over the past year are, and will be, with me. I get to keep those, and that won't change.

To everyone I've met in the past year: Thanks!

RE: Matt Walsh's take on Robin Williams' suicide

First of all, I just got off of work (now, a couple of hours ago... Haha), at my early morning job, when I read Matt Walsh's blog article. So I'm about to go back to bed (in the morning), but I feel like I need to write some feelings out before I forget. Which means this probably won't be written very well... With that being said, this is all based on my personal opinions and experiences; I could kind of care less about scientific blah blah blahs. Anyways, there's some heavy stuff in here, but bear with me.

I agree with most of what Mr. Matt Walsh has stated. Suicide is a choice. A very bad choice that may be a result of depression, but not because of depression. While I may not seem to be all that credible regarding depression, I too have had my experiences - whether it was with myself, or with others. I can't say that I've experienced the extreme/clinical depression that my close friends have suffered, as theirs is absolutely indescribable. However, I would believe it if someone told me that my past tendencies to pill pop were a result of depression. This seems confusing, right? Were my attempts at overdosing caused because I was depressed? On the contrary, I chose to attempt such actions as a means of escape. I knew that there were other ways I could overcome the evil voices overwhelming my mind. And I knew that there were other ways to fill whatever void I felt.

The trouble with most other people is that they may not know that there are other ways to escape, or other ways to "free" yourself; or they know, but are in denial. They have convinced themselves that suicide is the only way to escape from their bondage, when perhaps sub/consciously, they knew that they could talk to someone. In fact, maybe sometimes, they have even wanted to tell someone, but unfortunately chose not to. They consciously choose to not tell anyone because "they can't help me anyways" or "I don't want them to feel hurt because of me." I can also promise anyone who thinks these things that if they just talk to someone trustworthy and loving, some sort of positive effect will occur. Before anyone jumps to accusations: no, I am not blaming anyone who has committed suicide for not going to anyone. I'm sure they have tried, and if not, I can understand their fears.

The truth is, people suck. There are some people in this world who are downright scary. Who look down upon those who face depression. People who tell others that they just need to "suck it up." To "stop being over-dramatic." "Get over it." And sometimes, these scary people are the ones who have overcome depression. People are so unpredictable that it makes sense as to why "victims" have such a hard time mustering up the courage to seek help.

Now with all of this said, I'd like to reach out to everyone. Please practice being sensitive about the topics of suicide and depression (or anything else, for that matter). It's a very real thing in our world today, and we need more people who are willing to just love. Instead of saying things like, "They're going to go to hell" or "they're dumb, stupid, idiotic, cowardly, etc.," just love. If you can't love them, love and appreciate the people you care about and those around you for simply living. (Although I guarantee that there is someone within your peer group who is suffering from something if not suicide/depression.) Ultimately, the best way to help anyone is by loving them.

Our job is improving the quality of life, not just delaying death.  -Patch Adams

I am really grateful for the friends who have not only been there for me, but also to those friends who have chosen to talk to me (about anything, really), whether I could actually do anything for them or not. I'm grateful that they felt that they could trust me enough to talk about it. I'm grateful that I was given the opportunity to express my love for them, and support them. I am grateful for the fact that they are still alive, and a part of my life, today. Life is beautiful. We just need to find it. We're not supposed to "live to survive," we're supposed to "carpe that diem!" (Evelyn)

Carpe. Hear it? Carpe. Carpe diem. Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary. - Dead Poets Society

Rest in peace, Robin Williams. I'm sorry that you suffered so much. I'm glad that you were able to live a good life. And thank you for all the joy you have brought to people all around the world.

PS. Please feel free to shoot me a message if you're curious about the specific details to my agreeing with Matt Walsh. It may be different from what is expected when initially reading that I "agree" with him.